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Page last updated : 15th March 2012

Tesco's Custard Sqonuts

Description : A square doughnut (yes, that's right, square) stuffed with custard and delicately decorated with an icing lattice on top. Very pretty !

Selected by : Phil


Phil : Sqonuts. There I've said it. Sqonuts. What the frak is a Sqonut I hear you ask. Well actually I'm not completely sure. In fact I haven't got a clue. The Sqonuts on review were purchased from my local branch of Tesco in Maidstone. I don't know if it is a more generic term.

Regular subscribers of the Brigade Models cake reviews will have recognised that we are by and large Kipling Snobs. Its not a secret that Tony has a long established fetish for French Fancies. Personally I'm still waiting for the Kipling "East European Brunette Fancy" to be released but my suggestions to them keep being ignored.

Mostly we try to keep our cake reviews to main brands that most people can buy. This generally means Kipling cakes since these are widely available. However apart from the seasonal specials, we've pretty much had all of the ones we both like. So in our quest to eat (sorry, review) cakes we're forced to look further afield.

Still with me? Good. And so onto the Sqonut.

The Sqonut was my choice. A bit of a naff one at that. Now I like doughnuts - what sane person doesn't? I particularly like custard doughnuts. What is not to like about a nice soft doughnut full of custard? Nothing. However a Sqonut isn't soft, its a bit on the hard side - rather like a bun as opposed to a proper doughnut. Its a bit on the dry side to be called a doughnut. Its got a bit of of chocolate on the top but that couldn't save it.

So not that good really. I think that I'm being generous by giving it a 4/10.

And anyway shouldn't it be "Squonut" and not "Sqonut"?

Tony : Well this is a bit novel - Phil gave me no warning and just turned up with them one evening. Firstly, what's going on with the spelling - where's the 'U' ? Surely everyone knows that there has to be a U after a Q !? Or are Tesco aiming to get down with the kids, and feel that leaving out a letter gets them closer to the illiterate text-speaking yoof of today ? But I digress ...

So let's put mutilation of the Queen's English to one side, and consider what's on the plate. A square (I'll say it once again in case you missed it, SQUARE) doughnut. Without a hole (details are important). And full of custard. The dough bit of the doughnut was surprisingly light, refridgerated cakes can sometimes get a bit heavy and, well, 'doughy', so we were off to a surprisingly good start. And it had a good helping of custard, they certainly weren't stingey with the filling either. On the freezing winter night that we tried them the workshop was sub-zero (literally - the melting pots read -2°C when we switched them on) so it was like eating them straight out of the fridge (actually it was colder than the average fridge that night), which meant that the custard wasn't too runny and, since I like cold custard, suited me down to the ground. So a big thumbs-up from me - would happily have these again. Only marked down slightly because they weren't all that big. 7/10.

Marks : 5.5/10

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